October 14, 2015

October 14, 2015
Should You Make Your Relationship Status
Public on Social Media?

Welcome to another day in my life. Today is Wednesday and we have almost made it through the middle of another work week. I hope you are having a beary safe and great week so far.

Question: When I look at someoneís Facebook, should I be able to tell from their information, photos and status updates if theyíre currently in a relationship? And should a personís relationship status be evident on all of their social media platforms?

Once the idea of "swiping right" became the potential start of a new relationship, all the old rules of dating effectively went out the Chrome window.

Itís the wild, wild west out there, and weíre armed with little more than our eyes, ears, and the vague hope that cute guy isnít planning to harvest and sell our internal organs on the Dark Net. Thatís why most of us look for whatever evidence exists about potential paramours by Googling their social media profiles. (Oh, donít act like youíve never done it.)

It's a fair assumption that someone is single if you meet them via a dating app (although thatís not always true). Things get much more murky, however, when you try to size up a personís relationship status based on a Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram account.

"Is that girl in his photo a girl friend or girlfriend? Sheís appeared in three photos in the past five weeks," you maniacally think to yourself. "Is that when they started dating or is that when they DTRíd (defined the relationship), or is she a new friend?"

Itís crazy-making, for sure, but not irrational in this day and age when our selves are very much defined by the online persona we present. These seemingly inane thoughts have haunted many of us at some point, but thereís a simple solution:

Everyone should just make their relationship statuses obvious.

Laurie Davis, the founder of online dating advice site eFlirt, advises online daters about how to best approach their strategy. Sheís seen it all when it comes to cyber questions and hiccups. Thatís why sheís of the mind that the less ambiguity, the better. ďA general majority approach social media for personal reasons, and your love life is part of your personal life,Ē she told the Daily Dot in a recent phone chat.

It isnít necessary to broadcast your entire relationship on your various accounts, she clarified, but it is a courtesy to your significant other and people who might be interested in you to make your status known.

"So often on platforms like Facebook, for example, people may not choose a relationship status," she said. "I think itís best to choose one so itís clear... If youíre not selecting something, itís important for you to post photos, post updates about your spouse. Make it clear to your followers. We all have followers that we donít 100 percent know IRL [in real life]."

Some people arenít comfortable with even disclosing that relatively minor amount of their personal life; we have heard many friends in relationships say "itís no oneís business whether or not Iím single." The problem with that argument is that itís kind of their business.

Hope you have a beary safe and great Wednesday!

Until we meet again; here's wishing you health, hope, happiness and just enough.

big bear hug,

Daddy Dab